You work out of a Hotel?
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
