so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
