Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
