TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize