Is it normal to miss your booty call?
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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