I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
soo... how was my night?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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