Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Randomize