Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
