I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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