Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Less talking, more tequila
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
