Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
While I was sneeking out of her apartment, there was a giant cage with a parrot in it. I half expected it to squak "hit and run...hit and run."
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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