You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
