i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
I just want nice things and good sex
I couldn't think of the word "bath" so instead I told him I was marinating in soapy water
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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