theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I didn't notice because vodka
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize