i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Randomize
