Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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