They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
