I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Randomize
