If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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