I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
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