I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
