I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
i think i just lost a toe
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
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