I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
