she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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