Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Lo siento on account of my penis...
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