I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Please don't give away my fajitas
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
