There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
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My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
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I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
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