i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
