It's like God shit irony all over that family
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
