The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.