I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
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