That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
Randomize
