Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
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