yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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