he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
