I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Randomize
