Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
