Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
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I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
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You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
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