We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
