New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Randomize
