I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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