So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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