I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
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i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
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I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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