i would punch a child for taco bell
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
there is puke in my bra ... again
dude. I can hear the air.
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