so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
