i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
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