Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
