she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
