5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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