I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Randomize
